Imagine walking into a quiet Nordic forest. The air is crisp, the trees stand tall and steady, and there’s a sense of calm balance all around you. That’s what Nordic workplaces often feel like—calm, collaborative, and rooted in a shared sense of equality.
But just like in the forest, where the occasional overgrown branch or fallen tree needs tending, underperformance in a team requires attention. Addressing it, however, can feel tricky in a culture where harmony is deeply valued, and feedback often leans toward subtlety.
How do you, as a leader, balance the need for assertiveness with the desire to maintain workplace harmony? Let me share a story that captures this challenge and offers actionable insights.
The Hesitant Manager
A manager I worked with, let’s call her Stina, once confided in me about a difficult situation she was facing. She was leading a cross-functional team in Stockholm and had a team member, Jonas, whose performance was slipping.
“He’s not meeting deadlines,” Stina explained during our coaching session. “And the quality of his work has gone down. But he’s well-liked by the team, and I don’t want to ruin the atmosphere by confronting him too directly.”
Stina’s hesitation was understandable. Nordic cultures, including Sweden and Denmark, value collaboration and consensus. Open confrontation is rare, and there’s a preference for maintaining balance over calling out issues bluntly. Stina was caught between two instincts: her responsibility to address Jonas’s performance and her fear of disrupting the team’s dynamic.
“I want to be fair, but I also want to keep the harmony,” she said.
The Cultural Lens on Feedback
In Nordic workplaces, feedback often carries cultural nuance. Leaders are expected to be supportive and collaborative, rather than authoritative or overly critical. This stems from deeply rooted values of equality, respect, and trust.
Yet these same values can create challenges when underperformance arises. Leaders may hesitate to give direct feedback, fearing it will come across as too harsh or risk alienating the individual. This avoidance, however, can lead to even bigger problems: resentment from other team members, missed opportunities for growth, and declining team productivity.
What Stina needed wasn’t to choose between honesty and harmony. She needed to integrate them. This is where assertiveness comes in—clear, constructive communication that addresses the issue while showing respect and empathy.
Building a Foundation of Trust
Before diving into performance issues, it’s essential to have a foundation of trust. In Nordic workplaces, trust is built on openness, equality, and fairness. If your team feels that you genuinely care about their well-being and development, they’ll be more receptive to feedback—even when it’s tough to hear.
I asked Stina to reflect on her relationship with Jonas. Had she invested time in understanding his motivations and challenges? Did he feel supported in his role?
She admitted that while Jonas was well-liked, she hadn’t checked in with him recently about how he was doing. “I’ve been so focused on results that I may have overlooked the person,” she said.
We worked on a plan for Stina to rebuild that connection, starting with a one-on-one conversation. Not to discuss his underperformance just yet, but to listen—to understand what might be affecting his work and to show genuine care.
The Art of Assertive Feedback
Once trust is in place, the next step is delivering feedback in a way that is both clear and constructive. Assertive feedback is not about being blunt or aggressive. It’s about addressing the issue head-on while respecting the individual and inviting collaboration.
I shared with Stina a simple framework she could use: Situation, Behavior, Impact (SBI).
- Situation: Describe the specific context.
- Behavior: Point out the observable actions or behaviors.
- Impact: Explain how these behaviors affect the team or project.
For example, instead of saying, “Your work isn’t good enough,” Stina could say:
“Jonas, I noticed that in last week’s client presentation (situation), some of the data points were incorrect, and the slides weren’t finished on time (behavior). This put extra pressure on the rest of the team to make last-minute corrections, which delayed our delivery (impact).”
This approach is factual, non-judgmental, and focuses on the behavior—not the person. It sets the stage for a collaborative conversation about improvement.
Inviting Collaboration
In Nordic workplaces, involving the individual in finding solutions is key. After presenting the feedback, shift the focus to collaboration:
- Ask open-ended questions like, “What challenges are you facing?” or “How can I support you in improving this area?”
- Explore solutions together, ensuring the person feels ownership of the path forward.
When Stina tried this, Jonas admitted he had been struggling with personal issues that were affecting his focus. Together, they came up with a plan to redistribute some of his workload temporarily and set clearer deadlines to help him stay on track.
The result? Jonas felt supported rather than attacked, and Stina addressed the performance issue without disrupting the team dynamic.
Balancing Assertiveness and Harmony
Addressing underperformance isn’t just about solving a problem—it’s about setting the tone for a culture where accountability and respect coexist. Here are three principles to guide you:
- Start with Connection: Build trust by showing genuine care and interest in your team members. Feedback is more effective when it’s rooted in a strong relationship.
- Be Clear, Not Harsh: Use a structured approach like SBI to focus on behaviors, not personalities. This keeps the conversation productive and avoids unnecessary defensiveness.
- Collaborate on Solutions: Nordic workplaces thrive on shared ownership. Involve your team members in finding solutions, empowering them to take responsibility while feeling supported.
Closing the Loop
A few weeks after our coaching session, Stina shared an update. Jonas’s performance had improved, and the team was functioning more smoothly. “It wasn’t as hard as I thought,” she admitted. “Once I started the conversation, I realized I could be both assertive and supportive.”
That’s the sweet spot Nordic workplaces call for. It’s not about choosing between being direct or maintaining harmony—it’s about combining the two.
As a leader, you have the ability to create a culture where feedback is not feared but embraced, where underperformance is addressed with empathy, and where trust and accountability go hand in hand.
If you’re ready to explore how to bring this balance into your team, let’s continue the conversation. Leadership isn’t just about making decisions; it’s about making connections that inspire growth. And sometimes, all it takes is a single conversation to set that in motion.
